I shop and eat out a lot. After years of complaining about consumer issues, I have decided to take a stand against them in January of 2006. Here they are:

1. I will not be sending out any physical greeting cards, thanks to another postage increase taking place in January. Besides, I hate the post office.
2. I will not go to Jiffy Lube, no matter how overdue I am.
3. I will never, ever buy music CDs at Wal-Mart where they water down offensive song lyrics, regardless of what CD I am buying.
4. I will stop the habit of buying bread every time I go in the grocery store, which I rarely end up eating, anyway.
5. I will not eat at Sbarro in the mall and pay their utterly outlandish prices. After paying $9.52 for two pieces of pizza and a drink the last time, I will never eat there again!
6. I will not buy any more gel toothpaste, which makes me thirsty and mucks up my toothbrush with gunk you can’t rinse out.
7. I will not buy any gum in a big multi-pack. I am tired of getting down to the last pack and when biting into a stick of gum, it shatters in your mouth, it is so dry and old.
8. I will not be tempted by Booberry and Frankenberry cereals next Halloween when I go to the grocery store. I am tired of having rainbow colored crap the morning after.
9. If I have to pay $5.50 for a sad excuse for a sub at Subway, I’m going to go ahead and spend $7 on a real one at Jersey Mikes. Those pathetic little triangles they try to pass of as cheese at Subway are ridiculous. What you get for your money is ridiculous, too.
10. I will no longer be eating at Wendy’s, which I have decided once and for all, is gross. Half of the time, the food is not only bad, but terrible.